Sucky day, a very happy un-birthday to me, and you

Sucky (birth)day extreme! Last night with cramps on toilet, but found that intestines were filling my colon (guess what I had to do to determine THAT - double ick!), and have to NOT do the deed for a while and hope it stops that. Many hours of moaning and cramps then sleeping for 12 hours, then finally able to pee a little, and then one of the breakthrough pills forgotten as well as my nerve pills and my entire body went into individual muscle spasm which grew and grew until I started screaming because I couldn’t not scream anymore. My jaws were hitting each other from spasms too. It all kinda sucked, even AFTER I took the pills there was that time of waiting, waiting, waiting for pills to kick in.

Of COURE time is relative and not consistent. Who needs Einstein and going around the sun at near the speed of light to tell you that: Anyone with chronic pain can tell you time isn't constant. The time when trying to sleep and the pain is there and stupid things like hair hitting my eyelid HURTS for some reason and I have to move it, that is SLOW time. But the slowest time of all is finally getting the pain meds down and being told, “Don’t worry, they should kick in within 20 minutes” That is a very long 20 minutes.
But from acid tongued hag to jokester when the pain eases, Linda came for the milk and asked me for my jug. “There is one on each side, so just reach over and squeeze your choice.” I told her. This was moments ago. During the pain time, I would have opened my mouth and like a dragon, napalm would have emerged earlier.

So birthing day SUCKS. Though I guess if the purpose is to replicate the pain of birthing, I was supposed to have been 45 minutes (induced) so no, I had WAY longer pain than that, I was 10 or more hours starting from last night. But hey, another hour and a very happy un-birthday to me, to me, a very happy un-birthday to me (sorry, the song is stuck in my head).

I will try, try again. I’m still alive, and hopefully, with a bit of boxing to hasten healing, my colon and intestines will start doing their job and stop trying to go on strike (never should of let them unionize). We go up from here.