Montag, 30. November 2009

13 Random Observations About '90s Superhero Cartoons Spurred By Ben's Post From Friday

I was totally going to put up my photos highlighting what was on Ben's desk this morning, but after reading our editor's excellent essay on the fanboy impact either "Batman: The Animated Series" or "X-Men" left on a generation of burgeoning comic fans, I decided to post a response instead. This is basically going to be an expansive comment to that post so please read it before following my ramblings here, and know that there's no real thesis I'm working on outside getting down a bunch of thoughts about what Ben said, many of which will likely be expanded into their own more thoughtful posts at a later date. Oh, and looking back over this after it's's really long. I'm betting only Ben, TJ and Rickey will get through it. Look for the Ben desk tour later this week! - KP

1. Before I dive specifically into the impact the two greatest superhero cartoons of the '90s, I should note that unlike Ben "Batman: TAS" and "X-Men" weren't the initial drivers of my comic habit so much as shows that kept me hooked through my early adolescence. Like Ben, I was born early on in the '80s, but my comic habit started at a very young age and was brought about thanks to exposure to an earlier generation of TV adaptations. From around age five or six, I was watching superhero shows including "Spider-Man And His Amazing Friends," "Super Friends: The Legendary Super Powers Show" and that more awesome as a memory than as an actual show "Superman" cartoon Ruby-Spears put out that just hit on DVD. I'm not sure these cartoons had a major impact on my falling in love with the comics form any more than my playing with Super Powers or Secret Wars toys did, really. Well, one impact they did have was that when I finally became heavily involved with the "universe" super stories of DC and Marvel around fifth grade, I was totally confused to find out that Spidey and Iceman weren't best buds or that Firestorm and Cyborg weren't important members of the Justice League, but those are really stupid when you think about it.

2. Without getting too far into it right now, I will say that the one show that's more responsible than any other thing in the universe for making me fall for comics was the Adam West "Batman" TV show from the '60s. As a very young boy, I was addicted to reruns of that series and watched each "new" installment with a total lack of irony. Adam West was Batman to me – a real living, breathing human being – and I found nothing about his adventures comical. Some day soon, I'll tell you the story about when I finally met the mad behind the cowl in real life, and you will shit a brick.

3. All that is more or less preamble to the fact that when my older brother Brian and I actually started buying comic books to get our superhero fix, it was pretty evident that Batman would be my reading bread and butter from the get-go. However for whatever reason, Brian gravitated towards the X-Men immediately despite having no earlier connection to the property like I did with the Dark Knight, so in the end I became pretty familiar with the core concepts if not the brass tack specifics of each property earlier than I understood anything else about any other comic books. In that respect, I was almost certainly pre-determined to love the '90s shows at the heart of Ben's post whether they sucked or not. Luckily, neither did.

4. Unlike Ben, during their respective primes sixth grader Kiel would have argued like a fucking crazy person that "Batman: TAS" was by far the superior show to "X-Men." Like, not even close, man. Surely a big part of this grew out of the amount of my own growing sense of identity I'd strangely poured into the Batman character from the age of five up – going from Adam West junkie to a fanatic participant in the "Batmainia" surrounding Tim Burton's 1989 film adaptation to diehard comic fanboy. And I'll readily admit that my early love for "TAS" sprung from the superficial elements it shared with the first Burton flick and "Batman Returns" (lest we forget, the show launched just after the release of the second movie, shared Danny Elfman's iconic theme music and took design nods specifically from Michelle Pfeiffer and Danny Devito's Catwoman and Penguin in its early seasons).

All that said, I'd like to think I'm remembering my own mind correctly when I say young Kiel also recognized the great amount of subtlety, style and smarts that elevated "TAS" beyond its kiddie fare brethren. When the show debuted, I'd already been reading Batman comics for years and had a grasp of how the characters could tell stories full of more "adult" themes and human emotions than most media geared towards kids in my age group could pull off. Neither the comics nor the cartoon were high art, but considering the fact that most of my peers were reading bullshit like Goosebumps, I think the respective work of guys like Marv Wolfman, Doug Moench, Bruce Timm and Paul Dini gave me a leg up on my understanding of how real, honest stories are told.

Though back then, I was hardly able to put into words why I knew Batman was a better show (some would argue I can't do it now!) I remember in seventh grade, my buddy Shawn Gelisse telling me "X-Men" was obviously way better because "Batman looks too cartoony but the X-Men looks like some real shit" followed by me chasing him down the hall and stammering about "TAS" having its own style or something totally ineffective against his air-tight logic.

5. Two other thoughts Ben's post pulled out of me that I couldn't fit in above: First, I also totally remember when Fox tried to show episodes of "TAS" during prime time on Sunday nights. I also remember that for whatever reason, they promoted the show as "Batman: The Series" for that brief run, and even then I didn't get how dropping "Animated" from the title was supposed to con people who didn't want to watch a cartoon into tuning in. I mean, it played in advance of "The Simpsons" for crying out loud. You'd think the network would assume SOME kind of adult audience would tune in without having to be tricked.

Second, perhaps unsurprisingly, unlike Rickey I could find no one to go see "Mask of the Phantasm" in theaters with me, so I had to wait for it to play on HBO.

6. Despite my extended rant above on how much smarter I was than Ben at that age (seriously, know I don't mean it to sound like that), I can't even pretend to deny that I fucking LOVED the X-Men animated series with every iota of my young being. And I agree with Ben that the show had many, many elements going for it that made it a much more attractive viewing option than almost anything on TV for boys (and girls!) of our generation. Like Ben said, the soap opera appeal of "X-Men" can't be denied. Though I was a passionate Batman supporter at that time, the "X-Men" was the only show I video-taped every Saturday so I could go back during the week and have my own mini marathons of the season up to that point (I think this started with the Halloween debut, which I taped while out trick-or-treating, meaning I still have the original animation from the pilot that was later corrected on reruns somewhere). And as each season rolled on, the show deepened its cast and mythology in endlessly engaging ways, culminating in the show's high point: their adaptation of Claremont and Byrne's entire "Phoenix Saga" cycle. Years later when the end of Bryan Singer's "X2" teased a similar adaptation for the movie version of the X-Men, most of my friends instantly caught the reference thanks to the cartoon, as I'd suspect most general audiences who got the "bird in the lake" closer would rather than having read the actual comics.

And yeah, the X-Men had a sheer "balls out crazy" factor going for it that "TAS" could never match. It may make the series look silly in a lot of places to fans today (or to older fans at the time of original broadcasting), but the off-kilter, over the top moments contained in each episode of that series remain highly entertaining to this day. At one point when we were all still at Wizard, Dave e-mailed around this YouTube compilation of the series bug fuck craziest moments, and for the rest of the week not a day went by where I wouldn't pass someone's desk to catch them watching it and giggling like crazy. To this day I lose my shit whenever one of the crew looks me in the eye and says, "The wild man of Borneo!"

7. One thing Ben didn't strike upon about both shows and how they related to burgeoning comic fans that had a particular impact on me was that each series had its own comic tie-in on sale each month for almost the entire course of each series' run. Like I said, I was already making regular trips to the comic shop by the time the shows debuted, but I know for a fact that buying both Batman Adventures and X-Men Adventures helped keep me a dedicated comics reader over the long haul in some pretty profound ways.

To start with X-Men Adventures: the series – and later other Marvel cartoon-to-comics efforts – took the track of adapting the episodes of the show as each 13-episode season broke down into a year's worth of publishing quite easily. While in general I wasn't all that big on buying comic adaptations of things I'd already seen elsewhere, X-Men Adventures hooked me early primarily due to the creative team involved. For the first two "seasons" of comics, the art chores were handled by Andrew Wildman and Stephen Baskerville, who Ben has noted elsewhere were a team that many would write off as a Jim Lee/"kewl '90s artist" clone except I really feel their work together held a dynamism and kinetic energy that was perfect for a middle school audience without sacrificing some solid storytelling chops. While I dropped Adventures in season 3 when the pair left the book, I kept snapping up any and all Wildman/Baskerville comics I could over the next few years, making them the first art team I followed regardless of comic (it's how I got into Larry Hama's G.I. Joe!).

And really, all props to Marvel mainstay and Adventures scripter Ralph Macchio, who used his extensive knowledge of the Marvel Universe (and the fact that he could get away with more blood in a printed comic than on TV) to make sure you were really getting more than a mere rehashing of an episode in each new issue. While my reading tastes took me elsewhere after Wildman and Baskerville left, I know Ralph continued to grow the "Marvel Animated Universe" as it was in comics for years after that, shifting the various series based on Marvel's various cartoons (more on which in a minute) from adaptations to original stories and eventually into a totally nerdy and fun piece of Marvel continuity trivia. All in all, I bet the animated adaptations comics were a lot of fun for a lot of kids (and adult fanboys) for years, and that's a good thing. Though in the end, Marvel's loose animated universe never hit the heights on the page like DC's did. Speaking of which...

8. Like its screen counterpart, Batman Adventures and its various spinoffs, counterparts and tie-ins stand as an unequivocal creative success on top of selling nicely for over a decade. I'm already dreaming up a bigger post on the animated DCU comics as I type this, but to try and keep this brief I'll just say that the success of the series, just like the cartoons, came from a stunningly smart mix of style, tone and accessibility. Sure, Timm, Dini and company set the bar in both spiritual and practical ways, but the DC animated comics really nailed their stories in a similar way thanks to the combined might of a fucking muderer's row of talent that at one time or another included names like Ty Templeton, Dan Slott, Darwyn Cooke, Mark Millar, Scott McCloud, Evan Dorkin, Sarah Dyer, Rick Burchett, Adam Beechen and more and more and more names not as familiar to most of you but just as accomplished in the end. It also goes without saying that whenever Dini and Timm came to do comic versions of their screen characters, the results were bad to the fucking bone.

Still, for the purposes of my increasingly long-winded nostalgia trip, there was no better TV-to-comics series than the issues of Batman Adventures by the criminally underrated editor-turned-writer Kelley Puckett and the sadly late and truly great Mike Parobeck. Like I said above, the best DC animated comics presented the characters with the same style and focus Timm's cartoons did only using the tools of their original medium to their full effect, and the Puckett/Parobeck Batman "one-and-done" stories were just gorgeous and entertaining comics. Clever, fun, character-driven, kid-friendly but open to all ages...pick any set of adjectives you'd use to describe your ideal superhero comics for younger readers and they apply here. I'd easily say that the pair's Batman stories rank amongst the greatest comic runs starring the Dark Knight in the past 20 years...period. Do yourself a favor and buy them up. My personal favorites are the stories starring the above trio of villains who were based on DC's then senior editors Mike Carlin, Archie Goodwin and Denny O'Neil that somehow take what could have been a lame "inside baseball" gag and turned it into three compelling characters in their own right. Guh. So great those books.

These days, I'm happy to see that DC still releases comics drawn directly from whatever current animated series Warner Brothers is producing for cable as it seems a no-brainer to have kids comics that a kid who likes the TV show can pick up and say, "I know this!" (as rare as that scenario may be). I'm also glad Marvel seems to be getting back towards that practice (albeit in more limited form) now that they've taken control of the production of their own animated series in a major way again.

9. From a pure nerd point of view, it was really interesting to watch how both the DC and Marvel brands attempted to expand their respective animated universes starting with "Superman: The Animated Series" and "Spider-Man" respectively. I think it's safe to say that while both shows were successful, the second round of series presented some diminishing returns each in their own way. Despite a strong start and a similar setup, "Spider-Man" really burnt me out as a young viewer when in its later seasons it took X-Men's formula of long, continuity-heavy story arcs and gave them ridiculous, season-encompassing names like "The Neogenic Nightmare." I don't care how often you throw a new crazy villain into the mix, when you get to "part XII" of a kids show, your audience is going to start quitting on you fast...even if you have "cutting edge" CGI web-slinging effects and a Joe Perry theme song.

Personally, I think "Superman: TAS" did a lot of improve upon certain things fans had come to expect from the Timm style established in "Batman." Not being tied to a movie, they got to tell a solid origin and then use that to build a few longer arcs for individual characters like Brainiac and the Kirby Forth World characters ("Batman" didn't need those elements really, but it was fun to see the same creative team tell a different kind of story to match the new digs). Similarly, a lack of expectancy on so much of Superman's world meant the creators could strip down the "Superman" myth in so many cool and necessary ways. I think the "TAS" versions of villains like Toyman, Parasite, Mr. Mxyzptlk and Metallo were far and away more compelling than their comic counterparts had been in years, and the later season team-up stuff did a similar job for heroes like Steel, Green Lantern and Supergirl. Still, if Warner Brothers learned one thing from "Superman: TAS" that it still sticks to today, it's that general audiences will always find Superman lame compared to Batman, who is a bad ass. That kind of bums me out, really.

10. Like TJ, I watched EVERYTHING comic book or superhero-related on TV in the 1990s, and I mean everything. I watched all the DC animated shows from "Batman: TAS" right up through "Justice League Unlimited," and I watched weird one-off programs like when USA was running repeats of old Filmation DC cartoons under the name "The Superman/Batman Adventures." I watched the brunt of every season of every Marvel show produced during Avi Arad's tenure as executive producer including that one season of the CGI-heavy Silver Surfer show, both seasons of the "Marvel Action Hour" featuring Iron Man and the Fantastic Four (which I had to tape each Saturday as they were on CBS at 8:00 am along with other weirdo syndicated shows like VR Troopers), the awful "Avengers: United They Stand" show story-edited by the same guy who did "X-Men" which starred most of the same voice cast, the even worse "Spider-Man Unlimited" spinoff that copped its costume from the 2099 series and the RIDICULOUS "Incredible Hulk" show that ran on UPN (both seasons). I guess what I'm saying is that I'm a huge fucking nerd.

11. And yes, I watched a little bit of all the non-DC, non-Marvel cartoons produced as well. Sadly, I only watched a few episodes of "Ultraforce" (never got into the Ultraverse comics) which I remember mostly for the recycled animation segment that accompanied Prime's transformation. Ditto the one season of "Savage Dragon" on USA's Cartoon Express only swap the Prime transformation bit with Dragon climbing out of a Chicago street fire in the opening credits. I was slightly more invested in the CBS version of "WildC.A.T.S" because it was one of the few Image books I really dug, even though it was on balls early on Saturdays. My brother being the real Image expert was always bagging on "WildC.A.T.S." animated because however it dealt with the concept of the Kheran Orbs or whatever wasn't as cool as in the comics, but I'm pretty sure it made jack shit sense in the comics too. Though I did buy several issues of the WildC.A.T.S Adventures comic series after I got the above CBS Action Zone one-shot with the sweet Jim Lee cover for free at the local K-Mart and dug Ty Templeton's take on the characters.

Lastly, I will say that the only other Image comic I kind of followed at that time was Spawn, which was briefly a favorite of both my brother and my best friend Tony. So when we heard that the character had scored his own animated series on HBO that was supposed to be bad ass and adult and not a watered down kids versions, that became appointment TV. On the night of the premier, Tony came over, and we made popcorn and set the VCR to tape and everything. Then, halfway through the first episode there was a scene where Chapel had a flashback to killing Al Simmons while fucking a prostitute doggie style and then starts moaning "ALLLLLLLL! I'M SORRY ALLLLLLLLL!" as he cums (at least that's how I remember it), and we totally fell into fits of hysterical laughter and never watched another episode again.

Oh, and we adored the MTV version of Sam Keith's The Maxx, so that pretty much made up for the whole Chapel fucking thing.

12. Like Ben, I find myself wondering which of today's cartoons will leave a significant impact on the kids who will stick with the comics habit into their 20s. Though the more I think about it the more I'm sure there's no way for me to tell until I meet some of them. For one, I've already seen how differently fans only a little bit younger than me view their favorite animated adaptations, including our good buddy Matt Powell who was a big supporter of "X-Men Evolution" which I could never get into. So who I am to assume how the young ones are responding to what looks like an overall killer crop of shows from "Batman: Brave & The Bold" to "The Spectacular Spider-Man."

Another factor in my lack of ability to zero in on whether current cartoons will have the same impact comes with the fact that the viewing landscape is already so radically different from when we were kids. Even in the recent past that was the '90s, cartoons were made either for short runs on Saturday mornings or in massive episode quantities to be in syndication every weekday. Like other "beloved" hits of my youth like "G.I. Joe" and "Transformers," both "Batman: TAS" and "X-Men" hit that sweet spot of both creative and commercial success that saw their many, many episodes live out for a number of years on weekday afternoons – eventually earning them a slot in the collective nostalgia consciousness of my generation while all the one-season superhero bullshit I listed above remains on Wikipedia only because of the super nerds.

With the rise of so many kid-centric cable channels, superhero cartoons made today rarely last more than two seasons of 13-episodes each and then don't see quite as many daily repeats as Ben and I were used to. Sure, there are a few series that have accrued more than a handful of episodes, but I honestly don't see any of the most recent crop of hero 'toons striking as hard with the adolescent masses as, say, "Spongebob" has. Based only on the totally non-scientific observations I've made of young cousins in my family and the general research that comes with covering some of these shows for my journalist gig, I'd say the closest thing we've got to a superhero show that is as popular with today's youth as "X-Men" and Batman: TAS" were with kids in my day is "Ben 10." And that's cool. Great show. I just wonder if all the animated product that DC and Marvel and both pumping out these days will have the impact on the comics buying segment of our industry that the big '90s shows had (which is arguably a small one at that). Should be interesting to meet some of these kids in a few years, though.

13. Just because I felt like taking this damn thing to 13 items and I couldn't think of another way to work it in, I'd highly, HIGHLY recommend that any comic nerds and/or animation fans who dig either of the '90s shows that spurred this whole thing to check out Greg Weisman's excellent "Gargoyles" if you've never seen it. I think that show combines the very best elements of both "Batman" and "X-Men" with a totally original core story. Actually, if I had to rank greatest superhero shows of all time, I'd place "Gargoyles" as #2 behind "Batman: TAS." If you have Tivo, set it to record the repeats that air in the middle of the night on Disney XD. You'll like it.

Lala covers Planet Terry 3

Original cover artist is unknown; Marvel 1985. Lala's website is here.

SUPER NEWS! And visiting a craft faire.

SUPER NEWS! Ready for it? Okay, the exciting news is that, with Cheryl and Linda’s help, we BROKE the record for postcards with 94 postcards in pretty much one sitting (yeah, the ebay stuff happened too but postcards important!). Zowie. Yeah, lots of hurting shoulders here. Got some good stamps, good postcards, every postcard was both stamped, stickered and individually written on. And personally selected for just that person. Which brings us to 3,400. Pow! Okay, not even WANTING to be trying to beat that record soon (It was an accident, I said it looked like 30, Cheryl said 60 I think, Linda said 69).

But that means that there should be postcards all out over the world before the Xmas slowdown occurs too badly.

The previous day we went to the BIG craft faire, no wait that was earlier on Saturday (same day as started postcards). But before I wrote the blog. On the postcards, we worked until 7:00 am I think or later a little, then got up Sunday and pushed to finish by 3:30 pm when Cheryl’s boat leaves. Cheryl and Linda really, really deserve a lot of credit for this.

Linda got mad, said that she couldn’t stand to see me in the pain I was working in (I have my ribs strapped now), she wished I gave the kind of commitment and love to myself that I give to the people I do postcards for. I told her I don’t have the time, I am running out of time. She knew that, which is why she was mad. She came back, she was sad, she was coping, a sad/mad thing. I am running out of time.

I don't want each person to think I didn't care, or think of them. I want them to know they make a difference, and this is the only way I know how to show it. And yes, I sacrifice what I have: my body. Linda says, it means less time, that makes her mad, and that I am in pain, and that makes her mad. She is right and yet, how can I walk away from any individual? Who goes? Who has a crappy week/month/year without relief? I want to do more, not less. But she is right, and I have less time, so my body tells me.

At the craft faire there were many booths, but we only had over an hour which wasn’t enough time to hear all the stories of people. And I can’t show the pictures where I get surprise gifts which might for example be in the post now or soon. But I did find Whimsical Preserves, who makes the Strawberry Mango – only 2 left, or 1 now as I got one (Linda bought the peach as it is her favorite flavour – she has it on her toast). There was also a lot of nice blackberry ones, like blackberry plum. I asked if she had brandied cherries and she said she might have some and bring them to the faire next week in James Bay for me (see her there! But the Cherries are for me! Yum, in Trifle, on deserts, in flambe!). At this point I told Linda:

Elizabeth: “Ug, I don’t like this picture, I look REALLY sick in it” (and my braid is completely hidden in the hoodie)

Linda: “You look sick because you ARE sick.”

Beth: Grumble grumble

Linda: “Considering you were fading in and out of consciousness the whole drive up there, you are looking pretty good.”

Beth: “Oh, I do? Okay, I guess.”

Linda: “You want other fact, I had to give you mouth to mouth again, in the van.”

Beth: “When?”

Linda: “Uh, um, was it when we got back? Hmm….”

Beth: “See, I can understand not remembering, but YOU should be able to remember” (is this so common?), “I bet you can remember when you get some more sleep.”

Linda: “Okay, see you later.”

Um, back to the craft faire, I met her partner and he and her children LOVE Ghibli films, and particularly Totoro (the children can SAY Totoro and like it, they also like Whisper of the Heart – which is one of Linda and my favorite films along with Only Yesterday – the UK subtitles are the best, just a note). However I was hurried along to many other stalls.

I talked to the man who shapes copper and wow, does he do an amazing job. If I had a window which could see outside, I would definitely get one. This smaller one I guess a foot and a half or more tall is $45 (20 pounds), and look at ALL the colours he has created just by stretching and manipulating the copper, none of it is painted on. Also, he was one of the few people who a) understood what it meant to have autonomic failure and b) had an appropriate reaction. He also understood what happens to me when planes take off, good in science and human biology. I wish I had talked longer.

When even the people who deal with people with disabilities or doctors play this game where they have no treatment, they have no plan, they have had no treatment for years. Right now I amsustained by artificial breathing, an prosthetic brain device, wheelchair, inability to feel to the point that today I had blood coming out of my mouth again due to a chip or something I must have rammed in my gums and not felt (I don’t feel below my sternum at all) prostetic upper and lower intestines, and drugs for helping the heart. So it gets tiring hearing how I shouldn’t leave my hospital bed but that I am going to out live them, or ‘Any of us could go at any time.’ – well yes, but unless I get a sniper rifle and voice activation box to aim it, I am the higher candidate for dying than them by FAR.

Sorry distracted. I like this picture a lot, I don’t know why. Maybe because I could do this, simply because I can’t taste stuff. Maybe because I want a kitty. Or to be a kitty. Kitty’s get to say no all the time, and if you upset them, they vomit in your shoes – that seems like a reasonable plan. And sleeping a lot is NORMAL for them plus they don’t care if it is business hours or not, and returning phone calls. And when they want attention they ‘decide’ to sleep on your computer keyboard. Yes, being a cat is okay (until the vet and they bring out the needle the size of YOU!).

We did 94 postcards. Thank you for each person who wrote me, those letters and postcards mean a lot. It matters, writing me, emailing me. It matters.

I hope the 94 postcards will matter, arriving early enough to avoid the ‘More Xmas post, just toss it on the pile.’ Someone asked me what I did. I said I guess I do postcards. When they found out the number I had sent they said, ‘you mean like e-mail postcards’. No, I meant like, find the right postcard for the right person, buy postcards individually, find stickers and send them out. ‘ one does REAL mail any more.’ Well, I do. We do, Cheryl, Linda and I.

Sonntag, 29. November 2009

(Two) Paragraph Movie Reviews: Funny People

If you don't have plans to see this movie, you can check the spoilers here and then come back.

Weird movie; not weird in the sense that it was surreal or anything (thought it was at times), but in the sense that I was pretty well entertained for a pretty lengthy period, but couldn't quite put my critical finger on whether or not it was actually any good. I'd tend towards saying it was a quality film, as for the most part the performances were top notch and Judd Apatow explored some really interesting and dark territory in ways that weren't overly maudlin; however, at over two hours, the story direction certainly wandered a lot, which was almost a matter of preservation given that length, but it was also a bit distracting as the transitions between what almost seemed like separate mini-movies could be a bit jarring. Also, despite its winding nature, the journey the main characters took was still pretty fulfilling to follow, yet it feels like Apatow botched the dismount just a little, as the ending is both a bit cliched and also somewhat unfulfilling. These critiques aside, I'm impressed by the inventiveness and sheer endurance of the filmmaker here on a movie that he could have probably cranked out as an hour and a half chucklefest; he certainly had a vision and committed, accomplishing what he set out to do at least in part.

Adam Sandler actually frustrated me a great deal here, in that he showed he really is a pretty bad ass dramatic actor in addition to being quite funny, but I wish he wouldn't fall back on the goofy voices when he doesn't need them. I was most impressed by how genuine he made his role (which I'm sure came in part from that he seemed to be playing himself, but still), and that really seemed to set the tone for the cast, as these characters felt like people you'd actually encounter, not just caricatures. Leslie Mann is the perfect example of this as Sandler's lost love who makes her mid-life crisis and failing marriage both real and compelling as well as not totally depressing (I also love that Mann is so talented that I can't imagine anybody ever complaining that her husband pets her in all his movies--and their kids are great in this too!). Ditto Eric Bana as the dickhead husband, but not a comically ridiculous dickhead, just a normal one who's not all bad. Seth Rogen ironically actually sticks out as Sandler's "everyman" protege because he doesn't deviate enough from his usual over-the-top schtich and thus feels like a weirdo from a screwball comedy dropped into normal people's drama (which itself makes for entertainment, actually). The supporting cast is stella, with Jonah Hill, Jason Schwartzman and especially Aubrey Plaza kicking all sorts of ass, plus cameos galore by everybody from James Taylor to Eminem. A weird movie to be sure, but in a mostly good way.

Samstag, 28. November 2009

San Diego Comic-Con 4 Months Later: A Cereal Look Back

It's been almost 4 months exactly since San Diego Comic Con 2009 and something's still haunting me: The extraordinary designs on the local cereals.

BREAKFAST cereals.

Like any guy my age at a comic convention, I look to save cash on non-comic goods including alcohol and food. That need to save money in case I find a copy of Mort, the Dead Teenager #1-4 is exactly why I found myself at the local Ralph's grocery store. Located a few blocks from the convention center, Ralph's will save you loads of money if you don't mind the 15-minute walk. And like any regional grocer, Ralph's has their own cheaper off-brand merchandise.

While searching the store for Mickey's grenades, I stumbled into the cereal aisle and couldn't believe my eyes. The off-brand cereal looked BETTER than the name-brand stuff! Here, now, for your pleasure are some of the brands I had the intense (sweaty?) pleasure of finding...

Tired of Grape Nuts? Why not toss some NUTTY NUGGETS in your mouth?!?

And I know what you're thinking. "Well, these look different enough from Grape Nuts that the customer will be able to tell them apart, right?" NO! You are wrong!

A few boxes down I had the pleasure of discovering this cereal from what I can only assume is the future:

Look familiar, Crispix fans?!?!

Hexa is clearly SO MUCH cooler! Like you live in one of those Bio-Domes (do they still have those?) on the moon or the sun or wherever they built those things before Pauly Shore crashed one that time in 1996. Ladies on the street would be like, "Whatcha eatin', Rickey?" and I'd be all like, "This? Oh, you don't eat this? Weird. It's just Crispix. From my Bio-Dome."
BOOM: Ladies impressed.

Next up is Honey Grahams.

And I know what you're thinking. "Oh, we have these at my grocer." WRONG! You're thinking of GOLDEN Grahams! And you can find them on the shelf RIGHT NEXT to the Honey Grahams:

I think you see where I'm going with these, so I'm gonna stick with side-by-side pictures from here on out. GO!

Fuck Raisin Bran Crunch! Ralph's has CRUNCHY RAISIN BRAN!

Why pump boring-ass Cookie Crisp into your face for breakfast when you can have CHIP MATES?!?! They even have a pirate mascot! NO ONE has a pirate mascot!
That's illegal, right?! If it is, fuck the law - CHIP MATES is here, so hand over your teeth cause we're filling them shits with cavities!

Honey Bunches of Oats can suck it. I need me some of the delightfully sounding Honey Crisp Medley, stat:

I don't even know what this is supposed to be an off-brand of, but I wanna shove fistfuls of it into my kid!
(I don't have a kid.)

And here's my favorite of them all. Don't look at the box for too long or you'll explode into a peanut butter cup and then I'll come over and eat you before the police or the government or the government police can catch me. I give you: FUSION...

If your local store is anything like my store, you've got pooty off-brands like Twin Grain Crisp:

Or Confruity Crisp (WHAT is a "confruity"?):

Or the VERY exciting Cocoa Bites:

(bite me, Cocoa Bites)

Or cereal with young girls on it:

Or cereal that comes in straws somehow:

I dunno what's going on, but name brands better step it up in the design department. They should at LEAST jot down some notes from Paul Newman's line of cereals. Take one look at a box of Newman's Own and you KNOW that box took a lady out last night and showed her a good time filled with romance and expensive dinners and maybe that box even got mixed up in a bar fight in the lady's honor cause some joker bumped her in the dance club and made her spill her apple-tini or Zima or whatever it was she was pretending to drink cause she didn't want to get too drunk and make the box think she was easy - I mean, come on, she had work the next morning and besides, it's been a LONG time since she found a cereal box she could learn to trust, but she just wants to take things slow after her last relationship ended in disaster, you know?:

If I make it to San Diego in 2010, I'll see you in the cereal aisle.

How ebay goes, and how Linda goes, fevers and stuck in bed.

Well, fever again, and again, and turns out black Friday is not the best time to do an ebay sale (So far, have been paid $3.99 from the 20 items of yesterday – of which only half sold – ouch!). I still have yaoi and most of my manga sets of romance, adventure, action and comedy to go (everything from teen, older teen like Tsubasa, from author of fruit baskets, 400+ pages and complete in 3 volumes to full adult romance like the way urban cities separate us in The Grey Forest), starting tonight and then going throughout the entire day tomorrow. If you want to see the manga on sale it is HERE (click on ‘here’).

Right now it just feels like one of those days that won’t end. I was out getting secret presents today, but having problems breathing the last few days. Staying conscious is a vital role is shopping. Linda has added a cordless phone to the WISH LIST because ours died and in the last two week, I have not been physically able to get out of bed (due to inability to move, transfer, etc) to let in the workers 6 our of 8 times and it is stirring up trouble. Ironically, one thing the workers are tasked to DO is help me from my bed to the computer. But since the management won’t do a lock box for workers, I have to buzz them in and right now we don’t have a phone that can reach. As for manga, I find I read less because I don't breath. Passing out has really helped my budget.

I went to craft faire, going to one next week to get brandied cherries. Must get brandied cherries. I did some of the postcard matching last night. The rest after my nap. Onward, onward, onward (Oh God, I AM fatigued).

Freitag, 27. November 2009

Animated Origins & Observations

You can tell a lot about a comic book fan by what super hero cartoon they watched growing up.

Ok, you can't really tell all that much in terms of analysis of them as a person on a deeper level, but there is some insight to be gained about how they came to enjoy the characters and genres they enjoy rooted in which animated series they watched as a kid, particularly fans of my generation.

When I was at the prime age for getting into comics for real, there were really two choices if you wanted to watch a contemporary super hero cartoon on television: Batman or X-Men. I can't really imagine two series more diametrically opposed. X-Men was strictly Saturday morning fare, and while Batman also aired then, I knew it more for being a weekday show. And while X-Men actually debuted in prime time ("Night of the Sentinels" part one hit the airwaves on Halloween night, 1992; I remember it well), it very much fit in the more brightly colored weekend world whereas the more gritty and muted Batman would have seemed right at home playing 8:30 on weeknights (and often times it did).

Batman was a very street level show with stylized animation by Bruce Timm that did not become visual shorthand until a few years later. It kept a very tight focus on its one lead character and his modest supporting cast, as well as the villain of the day. Though there was some progression in terms of character arcs, for the most part, each episode was standalone, with the occasional two-parter but no season-spanning mega-stories. Violence on the show was also very realistic--i.e. guns shot bullets as opposed to lasers--and overall the series had a more mature feel, even though it was perfectly accessible to kids.

And even though now I recognize Batman: TAS as something of a revolutionary work that led to a real animated renaissance, at the time, it bored the hell out of me.
By contrast, X-Men was a larger-than-life comic book come to life that didn't have the intelligence or finesse of Batman, but compensated with wild energy or over-the-top action. The figures looked as close to Jim Lee's then iconic X-Men as animation could get. Every episode led in to the next in some fashion, with a running continuity that paralleled the comics on which the show was based and stories that took full seasons to culminate (even though some weeks you'd just get a wink to the big picture with Professor X and Magneto trapped in the Savage Land as a coda after the X-Men fought the Juggernaut or Mojo). The violence was cartoony in every sense, with cops packing laser guns and punches never actually making contact with their intended target (there was a lot of throwing and dodging as far as fight choreography).

Again, I can watch the compilations on YouTube now and see how ridiculous this show was, but I still remember it fondly despite, and when I was 12, it was the coolest thing on TV.

I think my preference for X-Men over Batman definitely foreshadowed that super hero comics were going to be the genre I'd be primarily loyal to, as clearly on the purest level even something that diverted as slightly as Batman into crime or noir wasn't my taste. I wanted bright colors, tons of characters and big, stupid action, not clever nuances. I like to think I've matured beyond that state (I'm 98% sure), but there's no denying there is still some baseline part of me that still recognizes that as my sweet spot. I remember still being at Wizard in 2007 and lighting up with an insane glee during the buildup to Messiah Complex as I realized we were reading a comic about Cable fighting Gambit and "Age of Apocalypse" Sunfire, a revelation which blew Sean T. Collins' mind (that's possibly an overstatement).

Flipping the script again, I find that my friends who were fiercely committed to the Batman cartoon as kids tended to discover stuff like Garth Ennis' Punisher and similarly off-the-beaten super hero path (but not too far off) work I've never really cottoned to.

Of course, there's also an ingrained loyalty to Marvel or DC that comes with how you spent your Saturday mornings or weekday afternoons as a kid. This expanded to folks who watched Spider-Man over Superman once those shows watched and had a lot of the same differences as X-Men and Batman. It's also interesting to note how DC went quite a few years between Superman/Batman and Justice League without a cartoon while Marvel had at least X-Men: Evolution; did that make a difference as far as hooking kids who were born in the late 80's/early 90's? Similarly, I wonder how the presence of Justice League Unlimited, Teen Titans and the newer Batman cartoons in the last decade in opposition to Marvel focusing more on DVD animated features until the last couple years with Wolverine and the X-Men as well as Iron Man: Armored Adventures has affected younger would-be fans.

But that's all a lot of thinking for me I don't feel like doing just now.

I do feel like my lack of enthusiasm for Batman: The Animated Series as a kid made the DC Universe seem like a muted, dour place I didn't feel like investing much time in, whereas X-Men made Marvel seem vibrant and crazed enough to really hook me. Years later, I really took to Justice League and then Justice League Unlimited, where I finally got to see huge casts, more epic stories and bigger action in a DC setting, which got me into the comics upon which that universe was based.

One last question for the group: Did any of you consider Ultraforce the formative super hero cartoon of your youth and, if so, have you just been wandering aimlessly for 15 years or so?

Max Clotfelter covers Punisher War Journal 7

Original cover by Jim Lee and Carl Potts; Marvel 1989. Max Clotfelter's website is here.

fight to be equal, try your limits, find your grin.

I had a new night worker this week who told Linda in the morn, “She’s amazing, but she pushes herself TOO hard.”

I push myself too hard. I have never asked anyone to push themselves as I do, only that they try their own limits.

This week I went up and did three games of badminton, not two. One was very intense, I served an 8 point come-back on game point only to miss the final shot. I was high on endorphins, I was talking to people, they knew my name, they joked with me. I was part of society, if only for 60 minutes. Then I came home. That extra game and the fatigue from the medical tests have had me in a fever off and on ever since. Before that the power was shut off for a day and I had to be moved because there wasn’t enough oxygen battery power. The fever spiked and then broke this evening at midnight.

I act, not like an able bodied person, but like a stable wheelchair user for an hour and I pay for days, and I expect I will pay more. I am on oxygen, I am pain most of the time, I try to use it to keep my mind sharp, since I can’t seem to have adequate pain control. Maybe during the US thanksgiving, was the thankfulness for health, if said specifically, for not being like me? Except I am thankful for my health.

Do I wish I had better health? That I did not cost Linda in both financial costs and in care giving costs? Yes. I am now in a state where I need close to constant care. Yet I still have that hour a week. And the stubble of new hair on my head has been felt. When a person has little, then the little things matter.

The neuropathy has affected my entire body and is now destroying all nerves (there are many kind of nerves from big ones to small ones). A partial para and I were comparing notes and we could both sometimes feel something big, like a toe breaking or something being crushed, just for a second, a scream of pain static making its way through, and then nothing. This week I got a locked cramp in my calf, waking me with the thoughts “AHHH!” followed by, “Great, I am alone, how am I going to get to that part of my body?” By the time I worked my way down my leg was at an angle due to the cramp which I couldn’t feel at all. I tried massaging my calf with hands, which couldn’t feel the amount of pressure I was using, or the muscles themselves. Then realized how ludicrous that was, took a muscle relaxant and lay back, leaving the leg still bent, and hoped for the best. That isn’t the absence of life, that IS life.

I am in the closet sexually. I don’t know how it happened, but it did. Maybe too many little comments from night and other workers, or the realization that if this person felt uncomfortable around me, I wouldn’t eat, or pee in a bathroom. A worker recently found out, I told her we were together “Sixteen years, and about five or six legal.”

The worker went on and on, “Wow, it has been legal for that long? I didn’t realize so much time had passed.” No lady, having a partner and being sexually active with her has been legal for a LOT longer, it is just five or six years since this province made it legal to have the same marriage benefits. Except we don’t.

The health care system is full of people who are within 10 years of retirement, and for whom it will never, in the treatment they give, be legal, and so after many tries they ask, “Where is ‘your friend’?” not, “partner, wife, spouse.” Linda jokes that one day SHE instead of everyone else will be able to ride in the Ambulance with me. Last one was empty except for a woman filling in paperwork, and yet Linda had been told they were ‘too full’ One day she will be able to be with me in the ER without sneaking in the back, or the ambulance entrance. One day the care agency will tell workers who ask not to come back due to our orientation that it is too bad they don’t want a job at that care agency and to clean out their locker. Because what they said breaks the provincial and Federal law, but no one enforces it. As do the doctors who talk to us, or me, or just her, they are all employees of the government.

One day after I sat there while Linda and a care manager talked and I said what my concerns were and Linda overrode me, and she and the care manager talked as if I wasn’t there. I sat and when the manager was gone I talked to Linda. I said, “My ability to control when or how I breath, or my heart beats may go away, my ability to eat, or excrete may no longer be my choice, my movements, my memories degenerate, my mind may degenerate but….BUT,” I was crying in anger, frustration and most of all pain of emotion hurt, “I will LIVE and die as an EQUAL human being.” She had treated me like an object, a pet to be negotiated about. She doesn’t anymore.

I am an equal human to each and every person reading this and you are an equal to me.

We may have different abilities, we may have difference circumstances but we are equal.

At badminton the player who doesn’t want to play with women and particularly not me, who cheats and tries to taunt and makes anti-disability comment, made comments about the badminton DIRECTOR and his badminton partner, “Well, you know, maybe he is one of THOSE KIND of people.” Yeah, gay, I got it. But he followed up, “Cause, you know it is legal and all.” Wink, wink. Why is it the people who use ‘legal’ as an insult don’t realize what rolls of their tongue is illegal. And illegal because they are NOT treating people as EQUAL human beings. I looked to Linda to see if she could hear this, and said that no, I think the two of them paired up because they had good game rhythm. “Yes, well you know I hear THOSE KIND of people naturally have good rhythm.” He said with a snigger before wandering off. I was speechless because though Linda and I come together, he obviously has no clue that we are married. I thought of wheeling to the center of the floor and making out with her right there.

In the end, I say nothing that night. But I am introducing Linda to him next week. If that is okay with Linda. Because she is out at work, and I am closeted at home.

I am getting a full DNA and Chromosomal work-up. I am sure they will find Chromosome 5 anomalies. But as for diseases, the only disease on offer is a degenerative disease often confused with late stage ALS, but it takes longer to die. There is no treatment. It is a bad match. The disease I match has a treatment and I will be working and working to get it. Because I want more than my hour a week exercising hard. And I want more than a few hours here and there of blogging, or when putting things on ebay it wipes me out for a week.

I have gone to medical meetings totally silent, I have gone to meetings with folders of medical journals, I have talked less, I have been mild. But I don’t lie. When a doctor, a manager, a director, a deputy minister of government tells me that no, we can’t be equals, I know that I should not be a voice alone. That the voices of every group who was declassified as non-equal, all of us ‘sub-humans’ should rise. But these are the fights we fight alone.

The truth, for a doctor is that, they are correct in a way, we are equal in status, since as paid public servants their job is to help assist ME, because the money has been paid, not for their benefit, but for mine (I am their employer). But when seeking specialist opinion on medicine, it is good to focus on that.

Besides, I am not just a doctor’s but most people’s greatest nightmare. The things which happen to me, and to my body are VIOLENT. They are ruinous, they destroy and the people who spent 10 years or more just to start helping can do NOTHING. Dr. G., the best, was honest, “We can help your symptoms, but you are going to be the best expert on your disease.”

I am not my disease, but when one is falling through the sky with a couple anvils tied to your ankles and one where your parachute should be, it is REALLY hard to know the difference. Except for that hour. And the pain and decisions it takes to get to that hour. Or these hours, in the middle of night, and early morn, that I write instead of sleep. I fear the sleep. I am always sleeping, always nauseous, in shock and skaking, in more different types of pain and fatigue I didn’t know it was possible to lose count.

“And rushing to oblivion
He broke into that knowing grin”

Those lines make me wonder if they know what it is like to live at the edge, the story of a pilot, his parachute not opening. I know what that feeling is like; knowing this ride is the edge, for as long as it will last. And so I grin, not because it doesn’t hurt, but because it does. I told my parents, “You know, for the amount of time I spent in studying, I have had a child, grow into an adult.” A pause, “I guess I chose wrong.”

And then, instead of sob, a grin.

I push myself hard because this is what it is, and while I want it to last for a long, long time, if Linda hadn’t climbed on me for CPR, that would have been it. But it wasn’t. So I grin, and push some more.
Maybe you could sit and listen to your life go by, to the lives of others you care about go by timed in puffs of oxygen, and temp, oxygen and liquid checks. I can’t. I don’t.

Things I am thankful for:

1. That I learned before it was too late that we ARE truly equal regardless of race, of creed, of religion, of orientation, of gender, of disability – that we are all human, and thus individuals holders of the greatest of all gifts: potential.
2. That one day there won’t be a need for me anymore. That people will look around them and care about people they know nothing about...yet.

3. That Linda and I have grown as individual and as a couple, and that Cheryl and many, many others have grown as my friends.

4. That I can still grin.

5. That love is a choice and an action: and I still choose and act. That those around me, and those who I have never seen choose and act as well.
6. That as long as I live, I learn, and that there will always be new people to meet, new limits to try, new things to learn.
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